5 A.M. News

The other day my girlfriend told me that she really enjoys sharing a bottle of whisky with me on Thursdays. A bit of strange statement, given that half these nights end up with her sobbing as I yell at broken furniture, but I’m not one to judge. I’ve always lived with the philosophy that an interesting life is better than a happy one, and that tragedy is the highest form of art. After all, you have to admit that hiding in the corner as your boyfriend breaks his knuckles on an oaken coffee table is more interesting that playing Solitaire for six hours straight.

The only problem is that sometimes other people get sucked into our world, with no warning of what’s going to happen. A few weeks back we’d been going hard, only to run out of liquor sometime around four in the morning. My girlfriend said she had a bottle of Rum squirreled away at home, so we mounted up and went over there, expecting to continue our vicious conversation unabated. Now here’s the thing – she’s been living with her folks while she completes her degree, but this shouldn’t have been an issue that night; they’d flown down to Utah the day before, and we should have had the house to ourselves.

Only they forgot to tell her that they’d rebooked for the morning. We found this out an hour later when her mother came downstairs to watch the morning news.

It’s been several years since I’ve watched anything on television, and even longer since I’ve picked up a newspaper. If she’d been watching one of those idiotic Breakfast-Morning programs – you know, the ones that dictate what percentage of Halloween candy your kids should be allowed to eat every night – then nothing would have happened, in all likelihood. The hosts of those programs are specifically chosen mutations, born with extra teeth, who hiss out an obsequious white-noise sort of dialogue to numb you as you prepare for another day on this awful planet. That’s not my cup of tea, but hating them is like hating the latest Friday night sitcom lineup; they’re not supposed to be good.

If she’d been watching one of those then I might have been able to stay civil, but instead she turned on the 24 Hour news channel, the one that cycles every five minutes and delivers nothing but soundbites and pap. First they reported on Balloon Boy; next there was something about a shark attack in the Florida keys; after that they started talking about some guy whose spare-tire exploded on the highway. This alone would have been enough for my horns to appear, but while this nonsense was being reported the ticker at the bottom of the screen listed suicide bombings in Pakistan, a proposed extension of the Patriot Act, and the sniper attack by domestic terrorists. I could hold it no longer, and exploded into a whisky fuelled rant against the television while my girlfriend looked on in horror.

But what was I supposed to do? Hell, I was holding back. You see, blaming the media for their lack of reporting is idiotic; they’re in the business of making money, giving the public what it wants. The only one to blame was the woman who’d turned it on, who’d chosen this nonsense news over anything of substance, and for my girlfriend’s sake I never pointed that out.

With every year that passes things are growing more partisan. On the left they’re all laughing at the Tea Party because of one jackass that thinks socialised medicine is comparable to the holocaust; on the right they think that global warming is a religion and that Obama was born in Kenya. Whether it’s CNN or Fox, they’ve learned to conform to the prejudices of their viewers (the party line, and nothing but the party line!) reporting the facts that support their biases, and ridiculing anybody who disagrees – no matter how many times Peter Schiff is proven right. Civil discussion is gone, having slowly devolved into the jackass brayings of quoted sound-bites, spoken in vernaculars which are fast-coming to resemble Orwell’s NewSpeak – President Obama is a Communist? No, he is the Chosen One!

Freedom of Speech is more than a fundamental right, it’s a goddamned moral principle – “I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.”* It’s not enough to just allow somebody else to speak, you need to actually listen to them; any time you tune into some biased, misreporting channel; the one that stimulates the part of you between your genitals and your anus, you’re throwing away the very things that make you human. At that point you might as well drop the pretention of being a civilized member of an advanced society, and just tattoo a logo on your head. You don’t watch the news so that you can be informed, you watch the news so that you can act as if you’re informed.

Attending your daily Minute of Hate because your life is meaningless is one thing; pretending that it gives you an educated opinion on the war with Eurasian is another.

Oh, and as for why my girlfriend puts up with me starting arguments with her parents at five in the morning? Because as awful as I am, at least I’m not one of you.

*Interestingly enough, not a quote from Voltaire

Thanks go out to Doctor Rob and PhilaLawyer for inspiring this post

The ACTA - Beyond Net Neutrality

As I write this, delegates from the Switzerland, Japan, Australia, the Republic of Korea, New Zealand, Mexico, Jordan, Morocco, Singapore, the United Arab Emirates, Canada and the European Union have gathered in Seoul under the watchful eyes of their leader from the United States. Dressed in a blood-red gown, he leads them through dark hallways chanting the ancient Latin prayer of offering to the MPAA as his followers flagellate themselves with the burning tips of a firewire cable.

But this is not a committee dedicated to the study of S&M; nor is it some harmless group of Opus Dei celebrants. These men and women have gathered in secret for a far more sinister purpose; out of sheer contempt for freedom of speech and national sovereignty, as well as a piously black hatred for mankind, they have gathered to discuss the Anti-Counterfeiting Trade Agreement.

* * *

Don’t let the name fool you; the ACTA has very little to do with actual counterfeiting. There are some provisions for creating international standards there, but the main thrust of the document is expanding copyright laws.

“So what’s so bad about copyright laws?” my mother asked me, “After all, you’re a writer – isn’t that good for you?” It might have been, if it were still the 1800s, or if not for the birth of an extremely evil man at the beginning of the 20th century. Of course, I'm talking about Walt Disney.

This monster created very little original content, preferring to steal it from his staff or borrow it from the expired copyrights of previous creative geniuses. It took a court order before he credited his co-creators of the original works they produced, and when singer/songwriter Peggy Lee sued and won the right to royalties on VHS sales of Lady and the Tramp, the company elected not to release it until after her death. Meanwhile, once they hit the mainstream, they sent out lobbyists to government to extend the length of copyright from 50 years, to 75, to 200; though many of their movies were modern derivative works of nineteenth century culture, it’ll be another century, at least, before modern artists are allowed to build on what they did.

The MPAA, the RIAA, the music industry, and Hollywood are just the latest players in a long line of corporate assholes who buy off politicians so they can control and profit from culture; first it was the radio stealing music, then it was people buying video cassettes, inviting their buddies to view them illegally, and then it was area-codes programmed into DVDs; every step of the way they’ve fought progress due to a myopic top-down view of the world, throwing out opportunities for growth and profit in favour of maintaining the status quo, however poisoned and sickly it might be.

But up till now, it’s only culture that they’ve been shitting on; the Internet, however, is too fast, too free, and too connected for them to cope. Those bastards still think it’s made out of tubes, and by the time they’ve figured out how to monetize mp3s, people are already screaming about DRM. No, there’s no accommodation this time – they need to shut the fucker down.

So welcome to the future, people – Telus lied, it won't be friendly. In fact, they’ll be first on the list of guys acting like assholes because of a bureaucratic gun to the back of the head. The new provisions the ACTA is hoping to implement are meant to do away with due process, and turn citizen against citizen. ISPs will have no more ‘safe harbour’ treatments, they will now be held accountable for any laws their customers might be breaking; it’ll be on them to monitor your usage, and no warrant will be required for the government to see what you’ve been up to. Accusations are to be assumed true until proven otherwise, and Fair Use policy will be thrown out the window. Cops will have the right to search your computer for pirated media, and charge you criminally – let me repeat that, criminally – if they find anything. User-generated content sites such as this blogspot will become impractical, as Google is forced to hire lawyers to monitor everything that is typed here.

If this policy takes effect, Microsoft is going to have to release a new gadget – a pair of red, beady eyes that sit in the upper right hand corner of the monitor, reminding you of the fact that Big Brother is watching you through the screen you’re looking at right now. Every bit and byte of your behaviour will be monitored, and if there’s even an inkling that you’re up to something naughty, any right against unreasonable search and seizure will go out the window. After all, it’s just the Internet, right? Freedom of Speech is only something that you have in the real world.

But don’t worry, though, they’ll keep YouTube online. As long as the monkeys are watching that, you won’t notice anything else that’s going on.

Links:
http://wikileaks.org/wiki/ACTA_trade_agreement_negotiation_lacks_transparency
http://www.michaelgeist.ca/content/view/4510/125/
http://www.boingboing.net/2009/11/03/secret-copyright-tre.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anti-Counterfeiting_Trade_Agreement

Flavoured Cigarettes

You damned fools have passed another law out of spite and antipathy to your fellow man, but you never stopped for five minutes to consider what its actual effects might be. That's right, suburbia, trust your government - I'm sure they've got nothing vile planned.

More in-depth details on the legislation here: "Reason Magazine: Sweet Lies About Kids and Smoking"

Feminism and Firefly

I ran into this article the other day about supposed misogynist themes in the television program Firefly. For those of you who don't know, its creator, Joss Whedon, had previously worked on Buffy the Vampire Slayer and is a self-identified feminist known for his portrayals of strong female characters. _allecto_, the author of the above article, begs to disagree.

While her article is worth a chuckle overall, there are a couple of specific passages (and comment-replies) I'd like to draw your attention to: the first involves the character Inara, a future-world prostitute/courtesan and self-employed entrepreneur:

Our first introduction to Inara the ‘Companion’, Joss Whedon’s euphemism for prostituted women, is when she is being raped/fucked/used by a prostitutor... Joss Whedon refers to rapist/fuckers who buy women as sex, as ‘eager, inexperienced but pleasingly shaped’ who ‘make love’ to women in prostitution. Obviously, ‘love’ to men like Joss Whedon, requires female powerlessness, force and coercion... If you are pro-prostitution then you are not a feminist and pro-prostitution/women-hating opionions [sic] are not welcome on my journal. All prostitution is rape.

According to her prostitution is a form of violence. I have to reply: You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

There are a lot of negative things you can say about prostitution; personally, I'm inclined to believe that it's unhealthy for both parties. But to say that it's always violent shows a complete misunderstanding for what violence is.

If we follow her premise that prostitution is violence, then it is on par with assault, theft, vandalization, murder, and physical threats. We need to ban it. And the only way to ban it is to hire some jack-booted thugs to kick down Inara's door, put a gun to her head, and then lock her in a cage...

But wait, aren't the jack-booted thugs (sometimes known as cops) supposed to use violence against the ones who initiated violence, not the victims? If somebody steals your TV, they don't lock you in a cage (though they might kick down your door for a laugh), they go and arrest the criminal. So I guess the cops should only be arresting the John (aka the violent rapist) since he's the one who initiated the vio-

But wait again, he's not the one that initiated the violence; that would be Inara. She's a self-employed business woman, who advertises and invites the Johns over to purchase her services. So she initiated the violence. Against herself. Ergo, we should hire some jack-booted thugs to beat the shit out of her.

What a beautiful little death spiral! Listen _allecto_, it's like this; law and justice are based around the principle that each individual is an inviolate island; nobody has the right to assault them, steal from them, or initiate violence in any other way, so long as they respect the rights of others. And - here's the important part - violence must always be fought with society's own form of violence. By no sane definition is consensual prostitution violence - trying to label it as such is the ethical equivalent of dividing by zero.

I wish I could accuse you of exaggeration... but you really believe this, don't you? You are utterly convinced that prostitution=rape, that it should be punished in the same manner, while (presumably) being against the arrest of prostitutes. You have no ability to see the distinction, and have never considered how the mechanics of your Big Sister society would work.

Point 2:

Zoe, of course, is meant to be our empowered, ass-kicking sidechick. Like all sidechicks she is objectified from the get go. Her husband, Wash, talking about how he likes to watch her bathe. Let me just say now that I have never personally known of a healthy relationship between a white man and a woman of colour. I have known a black woman whose white husband would strangle and bash her while her young children watched. My white grandfather liked black women because they were ‘exotic’, and he did not, could not treat women, especially women of colour, like human beings. I grew up watching my great aunts, my aunty and my mother all treated like shit by their white husbands, the men they loved. So you will forgive me for believing that the character, Wash, is a rapist and an abuser, particularly considering that he treats Zoe like an object and possession.

_allecto_, you're a racist. You pretend to be a progressive thinker with your esoteric feminist politics - but at you're heart you're full of the worst sort of bigoted and chauvinistic beliefs that the original feminists were fighting against.

You are convinced that women are so fundamentally flawed and weak that for two lesbians to penetrate each other with their fingers, it is equivalent to rape. Women can never be equal in your mind, and that's why you hate men. Not because you're a misandrist - but because at your heart your bitter and ugly self-hating misogynist.

Keep writing the blog posts, though, it's cute when dykes throw a hissy fit. :)

Stalkers

Last week, I was driving back from the girlfriend's house, about midnight or so on a Tuesday. I was mostly driving through residential neighbourhoods, on a 50 km/h main drag, but one portion passed through a city park which spans most of the city, and has underground tunnels for the pedestrians and bike-riders.

Most of the time, people go through here at 65 or 70 - and it's perfectly safe. There's few, if any, pedestrians walking along the road, and given that it's a mild valley the extra momentum can be useful for making your way up the other side. They don't post it as 70, of course, because it's only about 400 meters long, and posting the difference would encourage jackasses to drive through at ninety; but I jog through the area most days, and none of the 'speeders' have ever caused me a moment of concern.

But regardless of how innocuous this short passage is - let alone the fact that there were no pedestrians at that hour - as I crested the rise (thankfully doing 53) I saw a cop cruiser waiting at the next intersection, just waiting to catch a 'speeder'.

Instead of chasing after criminals - these pigs are stalking the citizens. Now that's what I call professional pride.

Welcome to Calgary.

Bias in the Media

The Ten Principles of Leadership

A young man planning to join our nation's military recently emailed me asking for advice on how to be the best officer he could be. While the focus of this blog is mainly political, Leadership is an element that runs through all aspects of human society, including the political and economic. It's a standard of learned moral behaviour which is just as important as comprehending Heuristics and Biases. What follows is my reply to him.

One thing you're going to internalize during your time in the forces, is a document called the Ten Principles of Leadership. It's a great list, so to start off, let me spell it out for you to give you a head start.

1. Achieve professional competence. One of the worst traits a leader can have is arrogance - acting as if they know more than they actually do. To relate to your troops, you're going to need to be competent at whatever job they're doing. Otherwise, you have no way of measuring their performance or guiding their activity.

2. Appreciate your own strengths and limitations and pursue self-improvement. This relates back to the last one. There's an old riddle which asks "Who's smarter, a platoon or their Sergeant? The platoon, because there's thirty of them." You need to have an accurate assessment of where you stand, and operate within those limits. Trust your NCOs, and listen to their advice - ultimately it's your job to see the big picture and allocate resources accordingly, but they're going to know more about their own field than you.

3. Seek and accept responsibility. The easy path is never volunteering, but an army where nobody volunteers - where nobody takes the first step - is an army of cowards. When something needs to be done, do it. Don't waste your superior's time asking permission when they're just going to say yes, anyway - take action, resolve the situation, and if you fuck up take ownership of it. Demand the same behaviour out of your subordinates.

4. Lead by example. This should be self evident. What you do will have more impact than what you say. Be the type of sailor you want your sailors to be.

5. Make sure that your followers know your meaning and intent, then lead them to the accomplishment of the mission. This is a huge point, and one of the biggest fuck ups most leaders make. Remember what I said about the platoon being smarter than the Sergeant? This is where it applies. Not only will knowing the intent of the mission boost morale, it will also allow your troops to think on their feet. You don't have the time to be micromanaging them - give them their orders, explain your orders, then trust them to fulfil them intelligently. During the Soldier Qualification phase of my Basic Training I had a Negligent Discharge. What caused it was that, although I had memorized all the rifle drills I was taught, the intent behind them was never explained to me. While unloading, I was still releasing the bolt under control, a practice which prevents micro-fractures appearing in the bolt head when the weapon's running dry. When it's loaded, however, doing so will prevent the chambered round from being ejected. I had followed the orders, but was never given their intent.

Ask me today, and I couldn't quote a single weapon drill to you, not even the IAs - but I'm one of the fastest to load and fire, and I have no problems dealing with a blockage. Because I understand the principles and the intent of all the drills.

6. Know your soldiers and promote their welfare. Simply put, you take care of your soldiers, and they'll work hard for you. They want to be there - you don't need to trick them.

7. Develop the leadership potential of your followers. A corollary to this, is that to be a good leader you must be a good subordinate. Leadership is all about keeping the Green Machine (or in your case, the Blue Machine) oiled and working. It's not some sort of messianic practice - Leadership is about being the best damn soldier you can be. Peons are the worst possible subordinates to have - you want thinking, intelligent, creative and responsible people under you. You want leaders.

8. Make sound and timely decisions. This is quite simple. During a combat situation, a good decision right now is better than a great decision later. You're going to be working on inadequate data - get used to it. Make the best call you can, and make it quickly.

9. Train your soldiers as a team and employ them up to their capabilities. Once again, self evident. Know your troops - and be concerned over their welfare.

10. Keep your followers informed of the mission, the changing situation and the overall picture. This follows up on number five. Keep the lines of communication open when possible, and trust your soldiers to make better decisions than you can on limited information.

(CFP 131(1), para 405)

One last thing - I find that there's a common trend throughout humanity, whether it be leadership, politics, or economics, a light-handed approach is usually best. Human aren't insects, they're creative, intelligent, independent agents. Trying to whittle down people to controllable units is a mistake, whether you're running a company, a society, or a military. Microsoft dominated by having small, semi-autonomous teams. Places like Canada (particularly Alberta & BC), the United States, and Hong Kong have flourished under lax economic restrictions, while Europe and the Communist world have faltered. In the Chinese military the infantry are trained in 'human wave attacks' - they're given no independence, and while Canadian/US soldiers prefer to initiate combat with 3-to-1 odds, the Chinese require 10-to-1. When possible, leave your people alone to do what they do best. As a senior Corporal, I was always of the opinion that the best sorts of Officers were the ones who stayed out of my way - and believe me, I treated my troops exactly the same. Embrace the minimalist role.